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A dog lover whose dog was a female and "in heat', agreed to look after her neighbor's male dog while the neighbors were on vacation.



She had a large house and believed that she could keep the two dogs apart.…

  Little  Johnny walked into class every morning with a black eye. After a  while his teacher got worried and asked him about it.  

  

  Johnny's  answer was: "Our house is very small miss. Me, my mother and my  father, we sleep on the same bed. Every night my father asks,  'Johnny are you sleeping?' Then I say 'No' and then he slaps my  face and gives me a black eye."

  

  So  the teacher says to him,…

From Florida

A Florida senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette convertible out of the dealership. Taking off down the road, he pushed it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little hair he had left.

"Amazing," he thought as he flew down I-95, pushing the pedal even more.

Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a Florida State Trooper, blue lights flashing and siren blaring. He floored it to 100 mph, then 110, then 120. Suddenly he thought,…